Just Because I Asked “Is there someone else?” – Tribute to Survivors of Domestic Violence
Just Because I Asked “Is there someone else?”– In honor of Survivors of Domestic Violence by Felicia Reed
Just because I asked if there was someone else, my life would forever be changed by a domestic partner. With a response “Why do you ask me that?” a live in partner would swing a fist landing on my face as though I were a punching bag. I’m thankful I was able to shake off the shock of feeling my face crack and watch blood spill from my nose like a running faucet as the pressure in my eye exploded. I had taken a hit right in the eye after being sexually tormented and provided more money to cover gambling debts for the week.
I had never seen blood flow so fast and bright nor had I ever smelled it. My eye started to close quickly and I was instructed not to move as the live in went for ice. While alone, I realized that I was losing consciousness and getting dizzy as my vision became more and more blurry. The pressure in my face was indescribable. I was able to whisper “my face is broken”. After being called every “bitch” in the book and told to shut up and allow the ice to work. I managed the strength to say this is serious and I’m passing out. Hands went around my throat. Somehow I managed to free myself. I found the strength to escape. How I was able to do was that I was completely dressed and just needed to grab my purse and keys while the live in was in his boxers. I called on all my power and did just that. I escaped. The angels were surely looking out for me because I literally could not see and I knew my contacts were floating in both eyes. Prayer and willpower got me out.
26 years ago car phones were luxuries and thankfully we had them in all three vehicles. From the car, I was able to call my family and alert them that I was on the way. I informed them I was going to need an ambulance and special care right away. I was asked if it was a car accident and replied no it was a fist and it’s not good….it’s my face and it’s broken. I assured them I was okay and in route. The adrenaline was definitely working for me.
At the hospital, a family specialist would examine me and call for a round of x-rays after slamming a wall so hard in pure disgust that pretty much rattle the whole ward as he asked me who did this and called for the police and a psychologist. The bleeding was incredible and no packing could be done until the scans were available. After reading them, sure enough there was a break….my orbital floor was crushed and my eye was in danger. The orbital cup holds the eyeball and it wasn’t a pretty sight at all.
Keeping it together and hours and exam after exam and seeing tears in the nurses eyes that cared for me and receiving love and light and being the talk of the entire hospital, I managed to eventually walk out knowing that I would be permanently damaged. We had opted not to do the surgery right away to give us time to come up with an approach. We had hoped for two weeks of self-healing and there was a possibility that one piece of bone would flip back up providing a good foundation for a prosthesis I would need to hold my eye. Just over one week of self-care, my eye fell while sitting in a training class. Surgery would be in two days and my ENT called for the only eye specialist he would trust me with to fly in from Buenos Aires. I’m blessed that he was already planning to be in his office as he expedited his travel arrangements.
Two world known specialists would work for hours in a rare and risky surgery to insert a special made prosthesis. Before that I was warned that the risks were incredible with the possibility of 1) permanent internal bleeding 2) brain damage 3) permanent blurred vision 4) total loss of sight 5) extreme nerve damage 6) total body impact and on and on. I signed all the forms accepting God’s will and leaving it with Him. Out of surgery and “unmasked”, my eye responded just fine but it was almost 2 inches off and I looked like I had been hit by three trains. I agreed to give it time and focus on getting healed up and getting 9 feet of packing out of my face. My skin had been pulled away from the skeleton inside my mouth and a four inch incision would be the battle wound of battle wounds. The doctors had to enter up my skull up through my sinus pack which was pretty much destroyed along with nerves and membrane as a result of the entry. On to more self-healing I went with using my own potions, cremes, teas, concoctions and more of anything natural I could find to help. Taking matters into my hands worked in my best interest.
The damage to that area remains today and impacts different body parts and functions while pinging with constant pain. There’s no medication for nerve damage. However, there are natural relief remedies that I have discovered. Some of the effects of course include sinus problems, nerve tingling throughout the body, wet face syndrome because the nerves are confused, eye pain, sensitivity to light and even more than one can imagine in areas of the body that one would never think. All nerves run to the head.
What happened after that “blessing to be alive” ordeal was not the end of abuse in my life. The last episode would come at 51 years of age and involved mental and spiritual abuse rendered in partnership with “friends” and family members. Life would yield a series of abuse that started when I was 5 years old. In my 50’s, I came to realize that there was something spiritually that needed to be healed and it may stem from past lives or was handed down through my generations. I would seek an answer and find an amazing path on my journey….I would find my life purpose in my quest to find why I was a magnet for abuse. I discovered the incredible truth….generational attachment.
TODAY, I support others on the journey of healing and moving forward in life as a Certified Coach, Wellness Advocate, Certified Energy Healer and one determined female to raise the female vibration as I operate a Females Without Fear Mastery Group. I have worked to save a lot of lives and I will never share their stories of what happened to them and how THEY did it. I am writing this blog in honor of Domestic Violence Month encouraging all survivors to get out of the ordeals and to take care of themselves but most of all to help someone else as we break the cycle. I encourage others to stand up and speak up in defense of victims and to never harbor or promote behavior that harms others. TODAY, I am healed energy that is still healing and will be healing as long as I am in physical form. However, I cling to my Spiritual existence to cope and to see the beauty of all life and enjoy it as much as I can as a SURVIVOR. You can do it to.
My prayers and blessings are with all those needing support in life. I’ve got buckets of ice water to share with everyone…men, women and children. I will pour a cup but it’s up to you to drink it.
About Felicia Reed
Felicia Reed serves as Founder and Owner of Put It In Perspective, LLC.
Ms. Reed is a certified Life Purpose, Spiritual and Christian Coach (member of the International Coach Federation) as well as a Holistic Wellness Advocate with proven results. She works with groups and individuals to promote positive and constructive life changes and infuses the use of energy healing, the use of essential oils as well as other modalities. She has a firm belief that the better we feel, the better we are able to live productive lives. Ms. Reed is a survivor of several life-altering traumatic experiences where she firmly believes that coaching and self-healing saved her life. She understands building the required determination and desire through difficult times to move forward. She works to provide coaching services to clients virtually and primarily in the Washington, DC metropolitan area.
In addition, Ms. Reed has over 20 years of process engineering experience which includes 15 years of financial management experience. She has served at both the state and local education levels to provide process improvement support. Ms. Reed is a quality management professional who works to infuse best practices in large organizations as well as personal lives through coaching and mentoring.
Ms. Reed has a strong desire to give back and has served on various boards and community service programs as a key volunteer and activist. Currently, she supports many local and national organizations in the areas of wellness and quality. She has been passionate about sharing quality management concepts with everyone she touches. She’s certain that these quality management tools also make great life purpose tools and therefore, helps others to apply these techniques to achieve positive results. After all, LIFE IS A PROCESS and we are all trying to get from Point A to Point B and beyond.
Ms. Reed works globally to make a difference. Her client base spans from California to Russia. The Put It In Perspective website is www.putitinperspective.net. The company FaceBook page is https://www.facebook.com/putitinperspectivellc. The Put It In Perspective YouTube Channel is: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCkpggvJP5NtFfcVtaC3GiAA Her team can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org.